My Sassy Girl
by puRpLebLuSh017
Summary: When she says, “YOU WANNA DIE?” It literally translates to: “I love you.” [AU][sasusaku]
1. Isa

Insert Standard Disclaimer

Note:** The plot isn't mine as well. (**Cries**) This is a sasusaku version of the Korean hit movie of 2001 entitled "**_My Sassy Girl_**" starring the angelic **_Jeon Ji-Hyun_** and the award-winning **_Cha Tae-Hyun_**. The major plot and scenes and dialogues are from the movie, however, changes are made, by me, of course to suit and keep them (**referring to Sasuke and Sakura _**somewhat**_** in character.**

_**ENJOY!**_

* * *

My _sasusaku_ version of

**My Sassy Girl**

_Written by Purpleblush017_

Two years ago, we promised to meet one another here and open the 'time capsule' we buried.

I came after two years of not seeing her.

I came just as promised.

She didn't.

_Click!_

* * *

Insert fan fiction cover:

A pink haired woman with glowing green eyes smiling, and looking straight into the viewer while her left arm locks a raven-haired man's neck as her right arm is on top of his head as if beating him. The man with those mysterious onyx eyes is sulking, frowning and is trying to escape her clutches.

**. : Isa : .**

"Kampai!"

And the sound of glasses of beer and laughter echo the place.

On the table where beer and chips and viands lay astray, composed of four seats, there sat four men—a blonde one who grins maniacally, a raven haired man who have his hair tied in a high ponytail and carries an unenthusiastic aura, a black-haired man who have thick brows and another raven haired man who has his lips in a thin line.

"Seriously, Naruto-san! I couldn't believe that you and Hinata-san are now going steady and serious!" The man with the thick brows smiled enviously as he eyed the blonde man who happened to be grinning.

The blonde man, referred as Naruto gulped down his beer and smiled, "Jealous, Lee? Haven't the flame of youth hand you down a girlfriend?" he laughed after saying his line.

"Ch, girlfriends are too troublesome." The man whose spiky hair was on a high ponytail interjected. "Women are bound to be troublesome."

Naruto threw a chip at him still smiling, "You always say that women are troublesome, Shikamaru! Then how come you always beg Ino to take you back after you break up?"

Shikamaru slightly blushed and drank another glass of beer, ignoring Naruto's declaration.

"Oi! Oi!" the man with the grumpy face whose lips were on a thin line snapped, "Why are we talking about_ women_?"

Naruto whistled, "Don't be too hot, Sasuke-teme. You just can't get over the fact that you, aside from Lee, _who is gay_," He said in a small voice, "don't have a girl to _hold_, _gloat_ about and _display_ with you like a trinket while walking in malls."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow, "Tch. I can have a girl whenever I like." Looking outside, he saw one woman pass by, he stood up. "Girls are easy to get."

Naruto saw the twinkle in Sasuke's eyes and knew that he was in a dare. He grinned, pushing him forward. "Then _show_ me, teme!"

"Tch." Sasuke took a step forward and was about to take another when his cell phone rang. Taking it off his pocket, he flipped it open. "Don't disturb me." he simply said.

"_What do you mean 'Don't disturb me.'? Is that the way to talk to your mother?"_

There was a slight change of his tone, "Aa, oka-san." He eyed the woman he was supposed to hit on walk away and out of sight. He sighed. He'll have to show and prove Naruto some other time.

"_Don't you oka-san, oka-san me, young man! Where the hell were you earlier? You were supposed to meet my friend—Mrs. Tanaka! She phoned me to tell that you weren't there!"_

Sasuke gave out another sigh and rubbed his temples, "I was lost." A good excuse he learned from one of his professors at school as he enters the class late.

"_You were lost? Lost, Sasu-chan? Don't kid with me. Mrs. Tanaka was just going to introduce you to a wonderful young woman! Why did you back—"_

What do you call it? Ah, set-up dates. Because when older people know that you're single, they assume that you are miserable and lonely. They make it their responsibility to find you a girlfriend. Which single people like Uchiha Sasuke think is unjustifiable. Older people just love to do match-making too much that they would pester single sons of their friends to go out with another single girl they know. _Entertainment_ for them, that's what it was all about.

"I didn't back out." He couldn't really say no to his wonderful mother directly, but Sasuke could always improvise. "I said I was lost."

There was another voice on the telephone talking to his mother, probably his aniki who just got home from his part-time job.

"_Oh, Sasu-chan, just get your butt down here and settle things with me!"_

And as the obedient and loving son Sasuke is, he laid defeat. "Aa."

Naruto will definitely have to wait another time.

* * *

Ding.

"The next train will be arriving soon. May we please remind you to stay behind the yellow line to prevent any accidents. Thank you."

Ding.

Her pink strays of hair flutter in air as she keeps swaying on the edge of the platform. She looks down, hands on her brown buddy bag. Sasuke eyes the pink-haired woman as she looks endangering to fall. The woman appeared to be completely drunk with all the swaying she kept doing.

Klag. Klag. Klag.

The train was soon approaching, getting nearer as each second pass by and the damn woman was still on the very edge of the platform, as if ready to commit suicide as she jumps and gets hit by the fast moving subway train.

Klag. Klag. Klag.

Her head was facing downwards, in what Sasuke thinks is of hesitation—to jump or not to jump? That is the question.

Klag. Klag. Klag.

She didn't really plan to move.

_Swwooooooooooossssshhhh_

The train stopped.

Sasuke's hands were on her shoulders as he has yanked her away before almost falling to her very end. As the people around them exit and enter the subway train, the pink-haired woman looked up to meet Sasuke's eyes narrowed at her, silently preaching her about her stupid actions.

Sasuke have to admit that the woman's green and shinning eyes made an impact on him. There was happiness and loneliness mixed together in those emerald pools. Her eyes were simply hypnotic. And her striking presence is at awe as her smooth satin skin reflects vividly with the light illuminated by the train station.

He yanked her free, a sign of annoyance of her stupid actions as she stare at him like someone who just grew a pair of horns. Leaving the woman to herself, Sasuke went in the train.

* * *

Sasuke stood by the left wing of the train, hands crossed, leaning on the door. It seems that the drunken pink-haired woman is in the same train as well, parallel to him. He eyed her as she sway as she stands, her eyes half-closed.

He might have passed for his caliber, but Sasuke would have to give her an absolute no-no. Why? Uchiha Sasuke doesn't like drunken women. A Major turn-off.

"Che." He cursed as he put his thoughts on another direction.

A man whose probably in his forties stood beside Sakura, who was in front of the seated people. Tucking her long pink strands of hair, he regained composure and opened her eyes.

"Oi!" She said with a raise of tone to the young man who sat in front of the older man. She slapped the young seated man's head. The said man winced and gave her a glare. She must have a heavy hand. "Don't you just sit there! Give your seat to your elders!"

Everyone including Sasuke looked at her as she made a scene.

"Tch." The young man glared harder as he flipped his magazine, falling into ignorance.

The pink-haired woman slapped again, harder it seemed as the man cursed. "Give your seat to the elderly, you bastard!" she gave a murderous aura, "You _wanna_ die?"

Cursing for the last time and scratching his head, which hurts, he sat up and walked away to the next compartment. With him gone and the seat vacant, the older man, who was in his forties sat. The pink-haired actions brought a smirk on Sasuke's lips.

* * *

The train stopped for the fourth time.

And Sasuke's stop would be next one. Apparently, the pink-haired woman was not yet getting off the train as well. _Coincidental_, he thought as he looked at her who looked nauseous. She looked pale. She held a hand on top of her mouth, keeping it in. Sasuke knew what was coming next.

With the speed of the running train, the echo of silence between the passengers, she puked over the man, who was sitting in front of her, throwing him what she ate earlier with a mixture of beer and acid, accommodated by the foul smell. Feeling distressed and ill, she turned around, looked at Sasuke, held out a hand and called, "Honey."

And she passed out, lying on the floor.

Everyone's eyes were on Sasuke. He looked back with a glare. "I'm not _that_ girl's… You _can't _possibly think that—" but when all the intimidating stares and menacing looks from the older people on the train, Sasuke had no chance of getting out of it. With indignation and insult, he approached the man covered with vomit.

He took out a handkerchief, ready to wipe some of the vomit off of the old man when his hands were slapped away. Sasuke looked at the man who cringed in anger, disgust and shame. "Just look out for your girlfriend, _damnit_!" The old man cursed at him and looked at the woman lying on the floor.

Sasuke could only grunt in annoyance.

* * *

Never had he thought that a night like this would dare happen to him. Never. With Naruto, probably, but with _him_? No freaking way!

But it did occur. And is happening now.

Sasuke spat curses as he adjusted his hold on the pink-haired woman he's carrying on his back. Said girl stinks. He could only wrinkle his nose in disgust. He looked at the bench and stopped. Slowly, he let her drop on the cold marble bench.

With a last look, Sasuke started walking away from her as if nothing had happened.

The girl shifted her position and dropped on the ground.

* * *

Sasuke has nothing to do with that girl. He didn't even know her. So why would he take full responsibility of her? It wasn't his fault that she was drunk. It wasn't his fault that she almost died when the train approached. It wasn't his fault that she puked all over the old man. It wasn't his fault that she passed out.

No. it wasn't his fault.

It was_ her _fault. Hers alone. It was her who made up her mind to drink until her mind spun wildly. And it was just justifiable that he left her there. Right?

Now, why was he feeling guilty?

Sasuke stopped abruptly in his steps and went back.

* * *

_Shit._

He could only curse as she comfortably curl on his back as he walked, looking for a decent place to stay. He couldn't possibly go home in this situation. They might think the wrong way, especially with his aniki in the house. No. he couldn't go home with her.

"Shit." He cursed again as almost all of the cheap motels where prostitutes and male takers go in and be 'merry' were all he could see. Not one decent hotel around. Of all the time for his luck to run out, it had to be this day.

There was no other choice when the droplets of rain hit his face and the thunder roared.

Cheap motel room it is then.

* * *

Kling.

"Yo! Welcome to the—" the person on the front desk tried to greet, but the plain sight of a wet, handsome and heavenly-built raven-haired man carrying an asleep pink-haired woman on his back was too much to make him cut his sentence short. Well, add the fact that he knew the man. "Uchiha Sasuke?"

Blame it on the Gods, they hate him.

Never had he thought his professor have a part-time job at a motel as a receptionist. "Kakashi-sensei," yes, his silver-haired sensei may be a pervert. But he didn't think he would go his far. He must probably have installed cameras in each room for a live show during those dull nights. "One room _please_." Sasuke said with the last strand of wit he has.

There was that weird and malicious smile etched on Hatake Kakashi face as he handed him a key. "I always _knew_ you had it in you, Sasuke." Smile. Smile.

"Fuck off, sensei."

* * *

Sasuke laid her on the bed and he plumped on the bed side, exhausted. After a moment of catching his breathe, he glanced at the woman and examined her.

That striking presence and aura was still there, captivating him. Her luscious pinkish lips which were slightly parted were enticingly tempting to kiss. The way her hair fell in a messy bundle was simply magical. Her chest, heaving up and down, those full breasts moving, slightly bouncing made him intoxicated with lust. Her smooth legs just behind her pants, delicious.

He leaned in to take just one taste. Just one. It's not bad as he think of it as his prize for the generosity he did for this woman he did not even know.

Yes, Uchiha Sasuke does have hormones. He shook his head, trying to wring off the naughty mental images inside his head. Just one kiss. And his hormones are working just properly.

He was about to dive in and take claim when the stink of vomit covered with the rain invaded his nose. He backed away quickly. Drunken women simply wreaks.

He looked around. Dare he think of it? Will he, a full-blooded male undress a woman he did not know and bathe her? As in naked? As in no clothes at all just bare skin? Sasuke blushed with just the thought. Something was tightening down there, in between his legs. He cursed.

_Shit! Shit! Shit!_

With his wit, his aching tempted hands rolled around her long sweater unbuttoning it one by one. As he smoothly took off the sweater, his hands brushed on her smooth and warm skin. As soon as the sweater was out of the way and thrown into the side, the stinking smell was eased at least three or four levels.

Sasuke gulped down as he saw the thin white spaghetti strapped undershirt. He could clearly see the butterfly printed bra she was wearing with a peak on its middle. _Bad thoughts! Bad thoughts!_ He chanted as he closed his eyes, concentrating.

The female grunted and scratched her neck. As most drunk people feel, she felt hot on the insides. And when you feel hot, what do you do? Ah, there, as Sasuke opened his eyes, he could see the pink-haired woman sat straight, barely awake. There, right before his very eyes, the woman took her undershirt of in a haste way, not even sexy, but still, seeing that bare skin and those curves and molds.

_Shit!_

And now she was trying to get her pants off, which she did in a hurry, without wasting any time. When the blasted thing she called 'pants' were off, she dropped on the bed with a thud, suddenly sound asleep again.

Without nothing on her—just her bra and panties, Sasuke's nose bled. As he has secretly read Icha Icha Paradise, he could relate and connect with the plotline of the story with what he was in right now.

With the strong urge, his treacherous hand stretched itself and was ready to touch and feel skin to skin.

When—

BLAG!

Police wrecked the front door of their room with guns pointed at him. "This is a raid! Stop what you're doing!"

_Fuck._

It was a great scene to see for the police officers:

A drunk woman only in her bra and panties while Sasuke's hand was stretched, only an arm-length away from the woman's bosom.

What a lucky day for Uchiha Sasuke!

* * *

The police officer called Sasuke and opened the door.

"You just made bail. You're free to go."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow. _Made bail? I didn't call anyone._ He stepped out of the jail and went into the front desk only to be surprised as he saw the one person he did not expect and wanted to be there. Really, of all the people, it just had to be him.

"Aniki," he breathed out.

As he saw the malicious smile on Uchiha Itachi's face, Sasuke knew that his dearly beloved older brother knew what happened to him. He racked his brain. Must be Kakashi-sensei's doing. He must have phoned him to tell _everything_.

Itachi greeted, "Ototo," he smiled again, very malicious and evilly.

Sasuke looked away, with a pink tint on his cheeks. "Tch,"

Older brother smiled, "So, you aren't gay _after all_!"

"Che."

* * *

Three days later…

Sasuke's cell phone rang.

"Hn?" he greeted the caller.

"Are you the one who kidnapped and _rapped_ me at _that_ cheap motel room?"

Sasuke's eyes squinted as his eyebrows met one another. "_What?_ Rape? Who are you?"

"Meet me later at noon at Shibuya." The caller demanded clear and strong.

Sasuke's hold on the cell phone tightened, "Miss, if you're that pink-haired woman, you must be mistaken I did not kidnap—"

"Later at Shibuya, at noon! Come _or else_!" she hissed on the phone. What kind of a person hisses on the phone?

The line went dead.

* * *

There in front of the park, stood a pink-haired woman, a weird hair color. She's smiling. Smiling as her twinkling bright eyes met my onyx ones. At least she was wearing pants and a very tight t-shirt. She waved and approached me.

"So, you're the _one_?" she asked, still giving a smile.

I straighten myself as the hands in my pocket curled into a fist. "Look I didn't—" realization dawned. "How did you know it was me?"

"The police officer gave me a picture of you." She grabbed my arm, locking hers onto mine. "Anymore questions, Mr. Uchiha Sasuke?" she uttered cutely and sweetly at the same time.

I raise a fine eyebrow at her, oblivious over the fact that she took the liberty of claiming my hand. "Your name."

If it was possible, her bright smile would have blinded me. "Haruno Sakura." She must be a daughter of light and warmth. Being in the sun made her features more powerful than at night. Leveling from what I've seen when we first met when she's drunken and wasted, she looks better and shining.

My train of thoughts scattered away when she started pulling me as she walked.

"What the hell? What are you doing?" I spat at her, annoyed.

She smiled. "We're going on a date."

* * *

**If you know the movie, you will see that I edited the scenes and some other things. Watch the original Korean hit movie of 2001 entitled '**My Sassy Girl**'! I swear, you won't regret it!**


	2. Dalawa

**Insert Standard Disclaimer: **_Naruto is not mine_

Note:** The plot isn't mine as well. (**Cries**) This is a sasusaku version of the Korean hit movie of 2001 entitled "**_My Sassy Girl_**" starring the angelic **_Jeon Ji-Hyun_** and the award-winning **_Cha Tae-Hyun_**. The major plot and scenes and dialogues are from the movie, however, changes are made, by me, of course to suit and keep them **referring to Sasuke and Sakura** in character.**

_ENJOY!_

* * *

My _sasusaku_ version of

**My Sassy Girl**

_Written by Purpleblush017_

"So…" he started.

I dare not look at him straight in the face. Because I know, I certainly know that there is one big and _fat_ grin plastered on it.

"Was it fun?" he nudged me slightly. "Was _she_ fun? Was she good?"

I grind my teeth. How could the situation turn out like this?

"For the millionth time, Itachi! I didn't buy myself a prostitute!" I snap referring to my little trip to that shit hole called jail. My dear aniki's smile falters and opens his mouth. "And _hell_ no, Itachi, I'm no hermaphrodite! I'm all freaking _male_! I even read and watch porn as much as Kakashi-sensei does!"

His stupid grin widens even more.

Dear good ol' big brother was holding a tape recorder.

"You glad you got that out of your chest?"

_Oh, shit!_

**. : Dalawa : .**

"Welcome, how may I take your order?"

She looked at Sasuke with those shinny emerald eyes. "What would you want?" she asked sweetly.

Uchiha Sasuke grunted and folded his arms right below his chest. "Can we go somewhere else?"

Haruno Sakura, this fierce young lady raised a fine pink eyebrow at him. "Why? What's wrong with this place?"

Sasuke snorted. He tilted his head to his right. The place was overloaded with children. Toddlers, babies and elementary students with strings tied on their wrists connecting to a balloon swaying in the wind above them. Aside from mommies tending to their babies, which were only three as Sasuke counted, they were the only adult there. And the stools were of bright colors—light red, yellow, green, violet, and blue. No way in hell would his butt touch those.

"This is a children's sugar fix store."

But she looked scandalized, "Afraid that this place would destroy your well-known masculinity?"

"Hmph,"

What a great comeback.

The lady cashier cleared her throat, "Ready to order now?"

Sasuke looked at the menu. "One coffee for me."

Sakura spanked his shoulder. "Coffee?" she uttered in disbelief, "You're going to order coffee? In a place where fun dreams and colorful childhood lingers? Hell _no_." she turned to the cashier, "Two vanilla ice creams, please. Oh, with sprinkles on top. And marshmallows. Loads of marshmallows. And squirt some chocolate on it too."

His disapproval was flushed down the toilet.

She looked at him, "You pay."

* * *

"So, tell me what happened." she asks, tucking pink strands of hair behind her ear, looking innocent as she made herself comfortable on the light red stool she was sitting on.

How dare she? The great and mighty Uchiha Sasuke was now in some children's sugar parlor. Where in the walls were painted with confetti and strips of different colors. And balloons. There were balloons everywhere. And his butt, that tight-ass goodness, now touching the rainbow-colored chair. Really, how dare she?

Sasuke glared at her.

_Let's see, you were drunk. Dead drunk. And you were contemplating on suicide as you stood on the edge of the platform in the subway. Which luckily, I saved you from._

"Oh, no need to stare at me intently. I already know I'm pretty. _Very_ pretty."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "You were drunk." He simply states. "And suicidal." The girl across him gave an offended look.

_Then, you happily spat vomit on an old passenger, calling me, who was on the other side, "honey" before gracefully passing out. Which is really great because I am perfectly aware that you and I don't know one another._

_And so, with the whole world thinking that we are lovers, I was forced, yes, _forced_ to help that old man and you—you stinking drunk woman out of the subway train._

"You were also delusional."

Sakura stomps her two-inch stiletto shoe on top of Sasuke's foot. Which hurt, _damnit._ But he wasn't going to her show that.

_Being the gentleman that I was, I gave you a piggy back ride. A _piggy back_ ride! As in—you were slumping comfortably on my back as I carry your ass to a motel. Where coincidentally, my sensei was working part-time. Lucky me, right? _

_With the sole intention of disposing your stinky clothes and nothing else, I was arrested by the police and gleefully spent the night at a fuckin' jail! I was charged with kidnapping and rape. _

"And I see that you are not grateful." Sasuke slightly slumps backward on his chair, easing stress. "Happy that you screwed my perfectly fine life now?"

_Because really, do not forget to mention my ever so loving brother bailing me out of jail with a malicious grin on his face. The devil grins!_

"I see." She stops and looks to her right, heaving a deep sigh. "I sort of remember calling you 'honey'."

His onyx eyes wandered through their surroundings. Miraculously, there place was now officially deserted. They were the only ones in the parlor shop. And then his gaze shifts back to the person in front of him.

Her pink straight hair swaying with her head movement, her glowing radiant skin, her tantalizing green eyes, her cute nose, her plump, shinny red lips—everything could make you want to go drown in her. With that fiery attitude, she's a real woman of the world. She, without the stink of alcohol, without the waddling movements, she's all woman.

A striking radiant woman at that.

Beautiful in short.

Sasuke contemplates as he snorts in annoyance. Did _he_ just think she's pretty?

The same woman who made him suffer?

The woman who caused him to get arrested?

The same woman who gave his older brother the grounds to bail him out of jail and use it as blackmail later on?

"I see that you're looking livelier than the last time we met."

His words cut her train of thoughts which translated to recalling what happened that night. Her lips twitched, "Was that sarcasm, Uchiha-san?"

Was it?

She leaned in, her breasts being squeezed by her arms, "Or were you hitting on me?"

Did he?

"Here are your ice creams!"

* * *

The first time Sasuke saw her—wobbling on the dangerous edge in the subway, puking and passing out all of a sudden; he decided that there was a lesson that needed to be learned. This girl named Haruno Sakura was indeed a drunkard. If not, then she's a creature who loves to have her alcohol intake more than she can handle.

Because really, what kind of respectable woman goes drinking past one in the after noon?

She does.

There were low chattering voices around. The small bar slash restaurant they were in was crowded with men and women with some children eating and discussing whatever they were. But one conversation instantly caught their attention.

A stifled laugh, "How rich are you?" she asked, her voice sounding childish. Her hair highly tied on a glittering strawberry strap on her right side and her pleaded skirt with knee-high socks gave one indication: she's just a kid if not in high school.

"Oh, I'm very rich." The man answered. He was wearing business attire. "I'm like a V.I.P. in our company." With his stance and the wrinkles on his face simply stated his age: old. Might be in his early forties or something. But he was too old for the young lady he was with. "I could give you anything you want."

She smiled in hope, "Really?"

"Really. If you just come to my pad and—" the man was cut off as he noticed a woman tower over him, her hands on her waist accompanied by a dangerous thin line formed by her lips.

"You! What do you think you're doing prostituting? Huh? Huh? And you!" her pink hair fluttered as she looked at the girl, "How old do you think you are? Going out with a man twenty years older than you? Are you retarded or something? Huh? Are you even of legal age?"

"What's wrong with you, woman?" the girl tries to save face. "I'm not your daughter! I'm old enough to drink!"

Challenged and irritated, she slammed her palm on the table, "Let's see that I.D. of yours then, _come on_! Let me see it!"

The man looked scandalized as everyone's eyes on the restaurant were on them. "You little hussy, who do you think you are? Putting your nose where it doesn't belong!"

There was a loud click, her stiletto's heels making contact with the marble floor. "Hussy? Why I oughta—"

"Sakura," Sasuke grabs one of her arms as it failed to break the man's jaw. "I suggest you leave this instant, sir. Before I change my mind."

"Let me go, Uchiha!" Sakura flails her arms free but to no avail. Sasuke had a vice-like grip on her. "I'm gonna beat you to a bloody pulp you sex-fiend old man!"

Said old man gets out of his seat, placing their bill on the table. "Che. Let's go." He ushers the girl to go with him. But she stays put. "Let's _go_!" he seethed, saliva diving out of his mouth. He held out his hand to the girl. The girl stood up and quickly ran away. "What the—_you_!" he turned to Sakura, "You just lost me my date!"

"_Leave_," Sasuke commanded. "Or I will personally see to it that you're will not be capable of spreading your filthy genes."

"You're crazy!" the man shouts as the guards escorted him out of the establishment.

"Ah!" she wiped her lips clean using the back of her palm. She pours herself some more sake and drank it with a quick gulp.

"You need to be calm." Sasuke lectures her sternly. "Your action earlier is foolish. You never attack a man in broad daylight especially in front of many people. Put that in that thick skull of yours."

A snort.

"You're saying that I should just let him get away with it? That I stay still and innocent while that poor kid gets raped by that old coot? Is that what you're trying to tell me?" she drank another round.

Sasuke rubbed his temples, "No. But there are other ways to go at it. You should have told the guard. Someone else. Someone who could fight back. Someone who could level with him."

"You sexist pig! I can _so_ take care of him myself! I can even beat you up if you want to! Come on, let's go at it! I know a place around the corner; I'll definitely beat your sorry ass!"

Sasuke's head ached, "You're annoying."

* * *

Out of nowhere, she started crying.

After drinking half of the sake bottle they ordered.

She's wailing hysterical like a baby.

People stop to look at them.

Very random.

"_Shit_," Sasuke cursed beneath his breath. "Stop crying, woman!"

She wailed harder and asked him, "Do you have a hanky?" in between sniffs. He handed her, though hesitantly, his magical and not to mention expensive and branded blue handkerchief. She unfolded it and put on her nose and blows. She does her best to recompose herself, whatever that was left of her.

"You see," she started, sounding pained. "that night, when we met, three days ago," she sniffed. "My boyfriend and I broke up." And her crying and wailing came again for another round.

Uchiha Sasuke was left dumbfounded. This was a new ground for him. A hysterical crying woman in front of him was already hard to handle. Because he always walked away before he saw tears from women who confessed their unconditional love for him. That said he completely had no idea comforting women. He had friends. Which were all male. And when they need comforting, they always go to a drinking spree.

"You should have kicked his ass then." He said, gulping sake down his throat. "You should have killed him right then and there." He eyed Sakura as she sobbed.

With her voice patchy, she was able to answer, "How could you kill someone you love?"

And she passed out.

Great.

* * *

KLING.

"Yo! Welcom—" he stopped the moment he saw him in that disposition again. "You got her wasted again, Sasuke?" He was sure that there was a grin behind his mask. He was sure.

Sasuke ignored him, "I need a room."

"Sure, sure. Every man needs a room. Though, it's still midday." He placed a finger on top of his chin. "This is suspicious. You are unbelievably getting addicted to sex this early—"

"One room!" Sasuke hissed, re-adjusting the pink-haired woman on his back. His arms were getting sore. "_Now_."

"Yadda. Yadda. Demanding aren't you? Here," Kakashi handed the room key, putting it on Sasuke's shirt pocket. "One room on the fifth floor."

Sasuke glared at him. "Aren't there any rooms in the first floor?"

Hatake Kakashi smiled, "Nope. And the elevator's out of service too. Feel free to use the stairs. It might do well for you. Exercise before the real thing, you get me?"

"Fuck you."

* * *

This had occurred to me. At that moment, when I laid her sleeping form in bed, that I am completely dazzled.

I started at her sleeping face. Stared at her for a long time.

From her legs to her curvy body to her healthy breasts up to her angelic face.

And then it just hit me.

I was captivated.

I was interested.

I was immersed.

With this woman.

This woman who appeared to be fierce and composed is shaky and fragile deep inside.

This woman, pretending, is hiding her true self in a facade because she knows that with just one touch, she'll shatter into pieces.

A woman in danger of breaking apart.

And I,

I…

I want to stick every part of her together tightly.

I want to complete her.

I want to support her shaky hands.

I want to heal her sorrow.

* * *

She tells him with those glowing green eyes he kept drowning into:

"Don't fall in love with me."


	3. Tatlo

**Insert Standard Disclaimer: **_Naruto is not mine_

Note:** The plot isn't mine as well. (**Cries**) This is a sasusaku version of the Korean hit movie of 2001 entitled "**_My Sassy Girl_**" starring the angelic **_Jeon Ji-Hyun_** and the award-winning **_Cha Tae-Hyun_**. The major plot and scenes and dialogues are from the movie, however, changes are made, by me, of course to suit and keep them **referring to Sasuke and Sakura** in character.**

_ENJOY!_

* * *

My _sasusaku_ version of

**My Sassy Girl**

_Written by Purpleblush017_

_When she woke up from her sweet and not to mention drunken slumber, she was on the floor and I was on the bed. How we managed to swap positions, is a mystery I dare not want to solve. She stared at time and space for a minute before she sat up and brushed her messy pink hair using her candle-like fingers._

"_What time is it?" she suddenly asked, filling up the silence between us._

_I glanced at my watch and sat up straight. "Eleven thirty." I winced at a sudden realization—I already missed two classes._

_She stretched her hands and mewled like a cat. "Tootbrush."_

_I didn't know why, but my hand automatically reached for the free untouched toothbrush on the table and gave it to her. She ripped it open and asked for a glass and toothpaste which I handed her. She then proceeded to the small bathroom with a transparent wall and started brushing her teeth._

_As odd as it may seem, waking up from another 'drag the wasted girl to a cheap motel'—that's how we started._

* * *

**. : Tatlo : .**

Attendance time.

"Uzumaki Naruto?" Gai-sensei called out, focusing on the attendance sheet.

Snicker. "I'm here, I'm here!" there was a 'cut-bowl sensei' mock at the end but it was suppressed that it came out mostly like a fart. Uchiha Sasuke who sat next to him only smirked knowingly. He regarded the blonde—Naruto—the ultimate moron.

"Uchiha Sasuke?"

Said raven-haired male looked up and replied: "Hn."

It earned a nasty frown on the teacher's face. "Where's the fire of youth in you!? Answer with your lungs stretched out!" There was a fit of laughter which erupted inside the classroom. It was probably because their _College _professor stood up and revealed his green spandex, "Say it with me, 'I'M HERE!'." which he was enjoying for he _glided_ and _twirled_ with background music and all that shit.

"Sensei, Sasuke-teme's lungs are already stretched out as it is!" Naruto managed to say in between his laughter. "And the stick stuck up in his ass isn't helping out either!"

Sasuke shot a glare at his seat mate and run a direct hit on Naruto's shin.

"Unleash your feisty youth, Uchiha! Sing to your heart's content! Say it out loud! Say it proud! 'I'M HERE'!" his not-so professional-professor pressed on.

Sasuke inhaled a deep breath and started, "I'm—"

SLAM!

Somebody entered the room, all heads attuned to the new comer, who suspiciously have the same green eyes and the same pink hair of that same wasted girl.

"—doomed." He finished as the said woman graciously walked up to Sasuke's front and smiled. She then pushed Naruto out of his chair and sat down. Everyone was silent, even Naruto, the loudmouth of the class was shocked, still on the floor.

Until she raised her hand and asked the teacher. "Sensei, isn't it time for break?"

Cut-bowl spandex-wearing sensei scratched his head, "We were just taking attendance right now and," he stopped as he felt the menacing aura she emitted. "your fiery youth is so unhampered!" he paused and grinned along with a matching guy-sensei-thumbs-up pose. "Sure! Let's take a break! And I'll just take a swift leak!" he said and went outside, looking for Kakashi to engage in a pissing contest.

Haruno Sakura shifted her gaze from the teacher to the dashing man beside her. The way she smiled was so serenely and innocently that he didn't expect the next few lines to come out from her lips. "Let's ditch class."

Sasuke raised a fine eyebrow at her. "You, woman, are impossible."

"No," She huffed indignantly and flicked her hair. "I'm actually the devil's advocate." There was a threatening smile plastered on her face. "Will you go or not?"

He looked ahead, avoiding her gaze because he knew he can be tempted easily and all she had to do was— "You!" he spat out. "Don't touch me_ there_!"

She frowned and blew a strand of hair blocking her eyes. "Hey, Mr. Macho, it's not me." she showed her two hands and pointed the one which was touching his –erhm— and that hand connected to the body of…

"Naruto!" Sasuke screeched, almost un-manly.

Nervous laugh. "I didn't mean it! I was just trying to get your attention!"

"Nice one!" Sakura gave him a wink, "you got it alright and a whole lot more! Tell me, was it big? Or was it really, _really_ big?" Insert big goofy malicious grin.

He tore his Ultra mega Wega Glare from the blonde fox boy to the angel in disguise woman beside him. "What're you doing here? This is not your class." He gave the emphasis. "Go back where you came from."

She pouted so cutely that the people who was watching the whole ordeal was now captivated and totally rooting for her. Who cares about the Uchiha genius? There's one hot piece of babe right there!

"You wound me deep, _honey_." Was her famous last words as she slowly and dramatically exited the class. There was something sarcastic and threatening underlying in her words, Sasuke thought as he felt a chill run down his spine.

When the pink-haired girl was out of earshot, the majority of the males went to Sasuke's way and started asking:

"Who's she? She's so hot!"

"Did that mean you two broke up? So, she's free, right?"

"Was she good?"

All was silenced when he grunted which at the same time Gai-sensei entered looking torn between shock and happiness. "Ugh, Uchiha?" he called out and Sasuke raised his hand. "You're excused. Go home."

The brooding man stood up minutely. He had an itching feeling this has something to do with her. His world stopped when his professor said (youthfully): "If you can, raise it together."

When he stepped out of the room and reached the hallways, he saw her waiting impatiently as she twirled her long pink hair. As she saw him walking up to her with a dangerous glare, she smiled at him. "It worked."

"What worked?" he suddenly asked and gripped her slender arm.

Sakura rolled her green eyes. "I said I was pregnant and if you didn't come out right this second, I will abort your baby."

Smile.

Twitch.

Smile.

Twitch.

Smile.

Sasuke turned around, heading back to the classroom. "They got it all wrong! Wrong!" he yelled but was pointless for he was tugged along in Sakura's vice-like grip down the stairs, outside the school campus and to Disney Land.

She was definitely the Devil's advocate.

* * *

Despite her appearance, she did have a hobby. As nerve-wrecking as it was, Sasuke was her guinea pig. He was the one who had to suffer all the things she did on the 'trial' department.

"This is stressful." He said blatantly.

She smiled at him and pinched him, which stung like poison. "We're in the park, feel the serenity and peace." She paused and pointed out a fist. "So read."

Yes, that hobby of hers—of all the things to choose from—it was writing. Her writing which she forcefully makes Sasuke read.

Sasuke rubbed his temples and started reading.

And it—the story went like this:

The time span was where ninjas and clan lords reigned. A ninja wearing a wolf mask was kidnapped and taken to the future. So the lover of the kidnapped traveled time and space just to save him.

Bang! Bang!

Insert shuriken and kunai projectiles.

Insert high-tech guns and laser thingy which the protagonist miraculously avoided.

So in the end, the woman saved his lover from death. The end.

"Shouldn't they kiss in the end?" Sasuke asked, walking side by side with the author of the story he just read.

She pouted and began twirling her hair. "It's an action movie not some sappy romance."

Sasuke shrugged. "People are melodramatic. That's why they love Romeo and Juliet and the like." He paused and thought for a second before he continued, "You know that drama series people always talk about? Where somebody died, she asked that she'd be buried with the clothes of her lover." He pocketed his hands.

"You're too stereotypic." She accused. "I want to be different." She licked her lips. "If I was given a chance, I'd change that drama to: she died, and she'd ask them to bury her _with_ her lover—dead or alive." She sighed. Her shoulders slumped and looked at him straight in the eye. "Isn't that sad?"

Sasuke looked at her with unwavering amusement, "Are you high?"

* * *

They were standing on the small port of the river.

She was surveying it with full comprehension. She tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Do you think it's deep?" she asked, still focused on the water below her.

Sasuke stood close to her, on high alert. "Hn," he replied as he contemplated on reaching out and yanking her away from the edge or not.

She glanced at him, past her shoulders. With the aid of the wind, the way she looked—her innocent and curious look, her flowing cotton-candy-like hair, and her tempting, luscious lips curled into a smile—was all magical to him and he wished that he could stop time and capture this moment, her look forever.

"Do you know how to swim?" she turned around, facing him.

Sasuke frowned. "Why would—?"

SPLASH!

Sasuke jumped in with only one thing in his mind: save her.

* * *

_In the silent moment of wriggling my hands and my legs to go further into the water, I was torn between awe and something I can't quite point my finger on. I was in awe because I dived into the water, unconsciously at that, with a task I couldn't believe I would do: saving a life._

_The aftermath didn't matter to me. The question that'll soon plague my mind was out of my mind's borders._

_Instead, I was focused on reaching that fragile body, falling deeper. _

_I wanted to reach her hand and pull her from this suffocating environment and put her in a place where she can smile whole heartedly._

_I wanted to save her, the damsel in distress._

_But who would have thought that saving someone _un-savable_ would be such a mess?_

* * *

She huffed for air, for life.

"Wow, it really is deep!"

He gripped her shoulder tighter for assurance, for safety.

"And you really are suicidal."


	4. Apat

**Insert Standard Disclaimer: **_Naruto is not mine_

Note:** The plot isn't mine as well. (**Cries**) This is a sasusaku version of the Korean hit movie of 2001 entitled "**_My Sassy Girl_**" starring the angelic **_Jeon Ji-Hyun_** and the award-winning **_Cha Tae-Hyun_**. The major plot and scenes and dialogues are from the movie, however, changes are made, by me, of course to suit and keep them **referring to Sasuke and Sakura** in character.**

_ENJOY!_

_

* * *

  
_

My _sasusaku_ version of

**My Sassy Girl**

_Written by Purpleblush017_

-

Who would forget the occasional get-together with friends which was cloaked with a lot of alcohol and teasing and sometimes, bitter envy?

Uchiha Sasuke wouldn't.

Even if it meant hours of drunken games and hundred questions and stabs about his masculinity with people—he would poke his eyes out before he could say it out loud—he considered as…_ friends_.

"So," a malicious grin came out of Uzumaki Naruto's face. On the his left was Hyuuga Neji, who was pretty drunk with just two shot and was now flirting with a very grossed-out Shikamaru on his side. On Naruto's right was Rock Lee who was in the middle of getting turned on with Neji's sudden display of affection towards their lazy friend of getting in the middle of it. "Sasuke-dearest," Naruto's voice slurred. "I heard you landed yourself a girlfriend."

Across the blonde man, Sasuke choked on his shot of Sake. And abruptly all eyes turned towards the defendant's direction. "Is she pretty?" came another question form Naruto's mouth. "She has to be, right?" there came that malicious grin again. "What would you do if you disappoint your Yaoi fan club members? That'll be a disaster!" Sasuke was staring to turn white. "What would your brother—the Yaoi fan club president—say if the first girlfriend you ever picked was a hotty-not?"

Neji smiled prettily, his hands not moving away from Shikamaru's you-know-what down there. "I'm secretly a Yaoi fan of yours too, Sasu-chan!" he finished with a girlish giggle.

Yes.

Who would forget the occasional get-together with friends which was cloaked with a lot of alcohol and teasing and sometimes, bitter envy?

Uchiha Sasuke solemnly wished he occasionally did.

* * *

**. : Apat : .**

* * *

Who the hell would call a girl puked on someone else and somehow manages to put the blame on you, acts as though you were the mastermind of everything, acts like a macho-woman who thinks she could turn down big real men with her puny height, get wasted again, act suicidal, and who imposes herself as a mother to your unborn baby—hell, you're still even a _sore_ virgin at that—your girlfriend!?

Who would call _her_ a girlfriend?

"Ouch!" Rock Lee groaned in pain. "It's nice that you want to play hit-Rock-Lee's-shin, Sasuke. But I think you're aiming a little to my left."

Sasuke, may it be from the courage brought on by alcohol influence or his mere ego, he would not swallow the fact. With a quick gulp at his Sake, Sasuke stood up and pointed outside the window. "See that woman who just passed by?" he headed towards the front door. "From now on, that'll be my girlfriend!" he declared before he closed the door with a loud bang.

Everyone was silent.

Until Neji broke it. "I know I'm dead drunk, but… did that woman who passed by had bright _pink_ hair?"

-

-

-

-

_That dumb Naruto! He can not make fun of me!_

Sasuke swayed, following the woman who was wearing a sun hat—which was quite weird for it was winter—and a green cardigan over her flowery sun dress. His brisk steps tried to keep up with him as they walked on the pedestrian.

"Miss!" Sasuke called out. When she seemed to be oblivious to the man calling her, he tried again. "Hey, Miss!" but to no avail.

_Damn! How can that small woman walk so fast!?_

He almost stumbled when he grabbed her shoulder for support. "Hey, baby." He managed to say out loud.

When the lady turned around and faced him—

_Holy Shit!_

—it was that suicidal self-imposed girlfriend of his!

Her green eyes widened. "Baby!?" she gritted her newly cleaned white teeth. "Who're you calling baby!?"

In a spilt second, Sasuke ran as fast as he could for his life.

-

-

-

-

-

"Whoa! That was fast!" Naruto smiled excitedly and looked all over Sasuke's side from left to right, "So, where's your new girlfriend?"

Ring. Ring.

Sasuke hid under the table albeit embarrassingly and answered his cell phone. On the other line, an angry female voice greeted his ears before he could even utter a word.

"_You! Where the hell are you, you low-life man! Hitting on random women on the streets! Is that what you do!?" _insert nasty breathing and ear-splitting curses_. "YAAAH! Show your face, Uchiha Sasuke!!"_

Shikamaru who was looking outside the window caught a glimpse of a woman talking angrily at her cell phone just across the bar they were drinking at. He gave a glance at Sasuke who was still under the table and then at the woman outside. With his genius mind, he completely understood the situation. It was simply ironic, he thought—that the woman he hit on was someone he knew. And by the looks of it, he did not just know her as in 'know' her. There was something more to that.

But when Neji squeezed him again, causing him to lose his train of thoughts, he asked himself why he had such friends who were so troublesome.

Sasuke pinched his nose and spoke. "The telephone number you have dialed is not active or is outside the service area."

"_What do you mean, not active!? ARGGH! You are so dead when I see you!"_

He disregarded her and went on. "The telephone number you have dialed is not active or is outside the service area. PLEASE don't call again!" and then he took off his cell phone's battery. When he sat on the chair as if nothing ever happened, he took the bottle of Sake and gave his friends another round of alcohol.

Sasuke yelled at them: "Let's drink till we die!"

-

-

-

-

-

Pause.

Rewind.

An Hour Ago, _or so_…

Haruno Sakura stood impatiently outside her college department's main lobby, holding her cell phone to her ear. "What? You're drinking with your friends?" she smiled. "I wanna come too! I want to see what kind of friends you have." She flipped her long pink hair from her shoulder.

"What!? What do you mean I can't come!?" Sakura fussed causing attraction from other people and yet she couldn't care less. "You remember this day, Uchiha Sasuke!" she stomped her feet, raised her fist and glared at thin air as if the person he was talking to was just in front of her. "You better not be with women right now!" Pause. Breathe. "Or I'll cut your penis inside-out with a rusty old scalpel _so_ slow that you wished you'd never looked at any woman other than me!"

Gasps from male passer-bys.

"Got it?" Smile. Smile. "Good boy! I'll give you a doggy treat next time!"

Clicks off phone.

Sakura stretched her arms. "I feel so stressed out! I need to buy a hat!" she said as she walked towards the outskirts of the University grounds. She looked at the cool sunshine and shivered at the cold breeze and smiled dashingly.

"I need to go buy a summer hat!" she grinned. "With a really cool sun dress!"

-

-

-

Pause.

Forward.

Hit _Play_.

-

-

-

Uchiha Sasuke was seeing doubles.

And yet he was giggling—something you don't see everyday. No, not when he's drunk. And after spending some 'quality time' with his so-called friends, he was drunk to the bones. Despite the sudden gift of being able to see twins of everything, he thought of vengeance.

Yes. If there was something Uchihas are known for, it would be their over bloated ego. Step on it whether intentionally or not, no matter how heavy or small the impact is there would always be room for a little something they call 'pay-back time'.

Flips cell phone and dialed a number.

He said, "I'm here at the last station. Pick me up. Come here in ten seconds. If you don't," he closed his eyes and felt such victory. "You're dead."

Beep.

-

-

-

-

-

"Ugh…" he held his throbbing head. "Damn hangover." Sasuke stirred and managed to open his eyes. And what met his eyes was something he could never forget—Huge men with tattoos all over their body came closer to him.

One asked, "He's so pretty! Is he really a boy?"

The one who had black glasses smacked him in the head. "Moron!" he gave Sasuke who was sprawled on the floor a left to right stare. "You could try and grab him _there _if you want to make sure."

Another huge man who was bald and had the most tattoos giggled. "Can I grab him now!?" he jumped excitedly. "Oh, please! Please!"

The first one put his hands on his side. "No fair! I wanna do it too!"

"Ooh, can we keep him, can we? _Can we_!?" the others chanted. "Pretty, pretty _fucking_ please!" a lopsided smile. "With sugar on top!"

Sasuke had never been so scared and grossed-out in his life.

When the sound of jiggling keys was heard, they all turned around and saw the police men unlocking the jail door. The man in light blue uniform opened the door and clicked his tongue. "Sorry to rain on your parade, ladies. But that hot piece of meat is already taken."

Sasuke dashed out of the jail cell. With the 'ohs' and 'ughs' heard on the background, he faced a pink-haired, green-eyed angel-in-disguise monster. And she sweetly smiled too. "Happy to see me?"

He looked away. "Che,"

She instantly grabs his collar and smacks him as hard as she could.

"What the hell, woman—!"

She started beating him up. "Don't do that again, you bastard!" _Smack!_ "You wanna die!?" _Pak!_ "Who the hell are you calling baby, huh!?" _Slap!_ "Hitting on random women!" _SMACK!_ "What kind of a man, are you, huh!?" _SMACK! SLAP!_ "You really want to die by my hands that much, huh? HUH!?"

From the jail cell, the huge men with an overdose of tattoos were at awe with her feminist way. "Why are you beating up our pretty boy! Hand him over to us!" their hands were outstretched outside the spaces in betweens of the jail bars. "Do not lump his body, you man-hater! We'd love to be the ones banging him! Give him to us!"

Sakura glanced their way and glared. "This man," she slightly raised Sasuke, "is _mine_." She turned to face the prey in her hands. "We already spent two nights together, right, handsome?" she sweetly purred.

Sasuke choked in whether displeasure or pleasure, he could not say. The underlying pretense in her words was too much for him to handle. At that moment, she was too hot for his eyes and his own good.

"Oh. MY. GOD! Pretty boy is indeed a real man! Look at how _big _he is!"

The pink-haired menace gave them a deadly glare, "Touch him and _die_." With a matching mischievous smile, she added: "Do not test my girl power, bitch."

-

-

-

-

-

Somewhere,

Out there,

Uchiha Itachi chuckled to himself as he watched everything on tape.


End file.
